1. Sit in a corner and pretend like you’re making out with yourself. (This works even better when 2 people are doing it separately.)
2. Pay entirely in pennies.
3. Tell them you require three copies of the receipt for filing reasons.
4. Order a shake, and tell them you want bacon with it. If they say no, complain loudly for others to hear, and scream out, "I guess you really don't wana see me smile do you, because right now I don't exactly feel like smiling in light of the extenuating circumstances!"
5. Ask to see the manager, then complain to him about all of life’s problems. If they don’t let you talk to the manager, walk out muttering, “You're gonna be reading about this in the papers.”
6. While you’re in line, jump up and down like you’re having a spazz attack and scream repeatedly, “YO QUIERO TACO BELL!”
7. Sell White Castle food in the restrooms. Then when people get food poisoning you can blame it on McDonald’s.
8. Walk in wearing a Burger King hat. (Great when 3 or 4 people do this at the same time.)
9. Bring in a fart machine and keep setting it off, meanwhile making comments like, “Man, I knew I shouldn’t have eaten here.”
10. Return your food and tell them you’re allergic to nuclear waste mixed with gasoline byproducts.
11. Bring in a video camera and tell them they’re live on 20/20. (You should see the looks on their faces!)
12. Stand on a table with a megaphone and whenever somebody complains say, “This isn’t Burger King, you can’t have it your way.”
13. Flood the soda fountain machine. (It’s more interesting than flooding toilets.)
14. Walk to the drive-thru window and order. (If you really wanna tick ‘em off, skateboard.)
15. Take about 30 or so straws and blow all the wrappers at people. If anyone gives you a look, act a bit too innocent.
16. Speak gibberish, and act confused when they try to tell you that they don’t know how to speak gibberish too.
17. Chuck something at one of the employees. (I bet you five bucks they chuck it back.)
18. Chuck Skittles, M&Ms, or other small candy back into the cooking area.
19. Take two bites out of your burger, then tell the employee it’s cold and ask for a new one. Then repeat. And repeat. And repeat.”
20. Act like a schizo while you’re ordering. (“I’ll have a cheeseburger.” “No, chicken nuggets!” “Cheeseburger!”) Slap yourself to make it look convincing.
21. Climb on top the Play Place. When they tell you to come down, fall off and pretend your hurt, then threaten to sue.
22. When it’s your turn to order, start a conversation with the employee. Ask them how was their day, etc. When someone gets ticked and calls for the manager, scram, or start a conversation with him too.
23. Try to stuff your coins sideways into the charity box. Then when they don’t fit, start complaining loudly about how McDonald’s is so greedy and how they’re ripping off their charities. (Act really outraged about it.)
24. Try to bribe an employee for cheaper food. If they give in, call the manager. (Keep any food they gave you, though.)
25. Walk in and go sit down in a seat, then grab the little table advertisement thingy, (you know what I'm talking about, the triangular thingy by the salt and pepper, yeah that.) Well look at it turning it over and over and then say defiantly, "I know what I'm going to order, I'm ready!" After about five minutes, scream out, "Waiter!" Then after about five more minutes get up, and stomp out of the restaurant with the advertisement thingy. Then turn arround, come back in, and throw the advertisement thingy at the cashier and yell, "Your service sucks! You just lost yourself a customer, you hear that! A customer! Your not gonna see me smile!"
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